Is going backwards, sometimes going forward?

Now there is a question, for me it depends on what I am going back to, for example I indeed did go back in a big way to my first boyfriend and then married him last year however there are many situations and times which I know to re-visit would cause pain and stress, so I most certainly stay away.

I have to say though this is a lesson I learnt from some experiences I did keep repeating often to the detriment of my mind and I am guessing many have done the same. As we look at going back it is important that we are doing so for the right reasons, will it benefit us in some way, will it help us now in the present time, will it make us happy and will it NOT give us regret in the future.

I often do talks around about mindfulness, living in the now and building resilience and one of the topics I cover is acceptance, which I believe is so important in our everyday life, part of this is acceptance of our past and how it is indeed what it is and what it was meant to be at the time. We cannot change it; the past is well and truly history so acceptance of what it was and what happened is a way to feel peace in our todays.

There are times that visiting our past can of course bring us great joy, for instance my hubby and I recently enjoyed our belated honeymoon in Ireland, a place for me that holds many great memories as I lived there for over three years back in the early 2000’s. It was a fun trip (although not long enough) and allowed me to make fabulous new memories of places I hold so dear to my heart.

The intention is to back soon and we have made a conscious decision that over time we will take some time to plan some other visits to places that over the years have created some other great recollections of the  past for me that I want to share, trust me having had 22 house moves in 24 years I can assure you there are plenty of visits to make.

I also intend to pull hubby along to visit many a joyous place where I holidayed as a youngster, Skegness, York, Aberystwyth and even Beverley in Yorkshire! It is times like these that can bring joy to our todays from our yesterday’s so embrace yours when you can.

So, as my friend Richard Wilkins says, ‘use your past as a library not a home’, wise words, dip into when it will bring back the joy but if it doesn’t it is wise to leave it well behind.